Saturday, March 6, 2010

3/6/10- why arent there any brownies in this house?!

this week has been exhausting- physically and emotionally. i cried a lot, but i didnt eat a lot which would have been my reaction to stressful situations. i even surprised myself! have you ever heard food call your name? no, really, you can hear it calling you.....ccchhhaaarrllooottttteeeee, i'm downstairs waiting for you....come and say hello to me! i know food doesnt audibly call you, but sometimes i think i can hear it. one night this week, i was extremely upset and was in search of anything that wasnt labeled low fat,fat free or zero trans fat. i couldnt find anything that would give me the satisfaction that my flesh wanted. what did i do? I ATE AN APPLE!!!! really? an apple? so, i'm eating this apple,crying my eyes out; mad that i didnt have any cookies/cake/brownies/ in the house. as i was crying, i began to laugh because in times past, i would have gotten in the car and drove to the closest store that was open...oh, what a change in me!

there is a verse in the bible that says, the spirit is willing, but the flesh is true! i have spent so many years giving my flesh whatever it wanted; never really listening to the spirit when it came to my eating habits. well, holy spirit, i think you finally got my attention!

all of me,


  1. First of all, I hope your spirits are in better order and you are feeling better. Secondly, I am so proud of you for making wise choices when your vulnerability could have gotten the best of you. You are fabulous! Love you!

  2. I was thinking about what you said about maturity and being at a different place in life. I remember before I had kids and my nephew was born. I remember watching my sister sacrifice so much of herself to take care of this newborn and thinking how miserable. i definitely was not at that place in my life. Three years later my son was born and that's when I got it. I was there, I had reached that stage in life and it no longer seemed like a sacrifice it's just where I was...and happy to be there! That is very much how I feel about where I'm at now. It no longer feels like a sacrifice it's just where I'm at. Not everyone understands simply because they're not at the same place. You're doing great!!